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MOUTH: Dora and Olivia [dialogue] - J's Novel in Progress

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-The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock
-Fiction Writing
-Holly Lisle Author Website

September 18th, 2005

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11:33 am - MOUTH: Dora and Olivia [dialogue]
D: I looked some stuff up on the Internet. It's a disorder, there's cures for it. They can treat it--

O: Treat it? Do you know how they cure homosexuality?

They have therapy--

Therapy? Do you know what kind of therapy they're talking about? Aversion therapy? Jesus Christ, Dora, do you know what that it? They hook wires up to your fucking balls and show you gay porn and shock you if you get turned on.

That's not what I was talking about, Olivia.

What were you talking about then?

I--there has to be something I can do for him.

I don't see what you can do. From what you've told me he's pretty sure that he's gay.

But he's... he's so young. I wish I could do something to heal him, to change his mind...

Change his mind? (--sharply.) You don't think he chose to be gay?

I don't know, I don't know.

How could you think that? Who would wiliingly make a choice like that, knowing they would face a life... a life of rejection and alienation?

You see? That's exactly my point! I don't want that kind of life for my son. I don't want him to be rejected and alienated, I don't want him to suffer, I want him to be healthy and normal and--

Well, you're not helping much, are you? You're his mother, you're the first person who's supposed to be there for him, no matter what, and now you're just condemning him--

You think I'm condemning him? What would you know about being a mother? You don't know the first thing what it's like to be fully responsible for someone else's well-being, their life! I am the first person who's there for him, I am the first person who's helping him--I'm trying to help him grow up to be a good person, I'm trying to do what's best for him! You wouldn't know anything about that kind of responsibility, that kind of commitment. Your entire world is about you--you only need to take care of yourself and you see the rest of the world only through your books and your writing and your job and you know absolutely nothing about what it means to be a mother, to be a family. You can just play with people and then leave when you decide you don't like them anymore, you don't want to see them anymore.

I cannot believe you just said that.

Every word of what I said was true.

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